Individuality (fine line) Stupidity

Case,

I've talked a lot so far — and will talk a lot in the future — about the importance of being your own man. 

I would love for you to grow up sharing some of the simple pleasures I enjoy in life, such as drinking milk straight from the carton (NEVER do this in front of your mom); annoying friends and relatives with talk of how criminally underrated Thin Lizzy is; and wasting an unhealthy amount of hours each day during the month of August lounging around the house while engaging in an unhealthy amount of fantasy football mock drafts. 

But, ultimately, it is important to forge your own identity and always keep your independent spirit at the ready. You don't necessarily have to lead, but don't automatically follow.

Having said that ... there's an old saying: "Sometimes you have to go along to get along." The idea is that you cannot avoid conformity your whole life, and that is true. Unless you work in the circus, but SO HELP ME GOD, IF YOU START HANGING CINDER BLOCKS FROM YOUR NIPPLES ... 

Anyway, you should cling to your individuality, but you need to be smart about it. 

For the longest time, I was not. I made a career out of doing things "my way." At times, it was fun. But in hindsight, it took me way too long to learn that there's often a fine line between individuality and stupidity (this is the basis of teenage existence).

For instance, when I go to work these days, I do so in a style of dress that would be considered "casual." I work with a number of people who dress up. They wear ties and tailored shirts. I'm not going to do that. But I know what I can get away with. If I were to come to work in my favorite sleeveless shirt, my tattoos in the face (literally and figuratively) of my co-workers and bosses, there's a good chance I'd be doing myself a disservice. I'd be giving people an excuse to use my individuality (and stupidity) against me. It took me many years and numerous bouts of self-sabotage before I realized I'd done similar damage to myself through the mistaken belief that doing what I wanted was ALWAYS the most important thing I could do. 

Your individuality, like your name, is something to be proud of. But your willingness to be your own man has to be tempered by the knowledge that the world is not easy on individuals (especially if you hang cinder blocks from your nipples). It takes work to be successful at anything. It also takes sacrifice. Making the small sacrifice of conformity (going along to get along) is sometimes the smartest thing you can do.

Bottom line: Be cool, but not too cool for your own good. 

I guess you can go through life
saying f**k you and your horse
And maybe you think you'll leave
... a good-looking corpse

But cool is a windmill,
a Quixotic mirage
And it ain't never been cool
to do the self-sabotage

You don't have
to play the game,
but it requires your attendance
When you don't play by the rules,
you and cool, co-defendants

You can dance with the devil
and the talent that brung ya
Just to find your approach
is the talent that hung ya

Ya cool is like water,
a mind's strange oasis
But it ain't never been cool
to turn your back on good graces

Often drawn to destruction,
a dumb moth to the flame
Go ahead, touch the burner,
same result, diff'rent pain

Show 'em all that one finger
and wear your heart without sleeves
Collect spite by the bushel
like the air that you breathe

But cool is a monster
that's living inside your head
And it ain't never been cool
to keep a monster well-fed

When's it's finally
over, if you still think you're right, 
all that's left is for cool
... to turn out the lights

And cool will survive
like a phantom in your dreams
But it ain't never been cool
to be as cool as it seems

Love,

Dad